Time to say farewell.

29 10 2017

Time to say goodbye.

An end to mark a new beginning.

New adventures, along with new challenges.

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Late night conversations with…

9 07 2016

Throughout the day and then later on at night the other day, the conversations that flowed varied widely in topics but all just as thought-provoking personally.

Similar to people, “you’ll never know until you try” is a common theme that permeates the conversations even in relation to countries, actions, choices and behaviours.

Instead of sticking to our societal norms, cultural or religious beliefs, perceptions of reality and of life, we should all learn to be open-minded and understand from another’s situation before we come to a conclusion to judge. 

Easier said than done, definitely. It’s not like I haven’t fallen into this trap of quick judgement.

Everything happens for a reason. Whether it’s aligned to your own reasoning, there will always be another reason, perception or belief that led to the outcome. 

Yet with this taken into consideration, let’s not forget too that this world is made up of things and people that are not us or ours to begin with. And while we try to remain open, there needs to be a balance to maintain the good order, harmonious environment for all. 

Seeing how things have become today, it’s getting increasingly difficult to place myself in others’ shoes to understand what is going on in our world today. The place we supposedly call home is no longer stable, orderly or a place filled with happiness and love for all…

And yes, I digress. 

It could be a quarter-life phase that makes me start thinking this way. It’s time to figure out what’s next, where I’m heading to in life, and review the envisaged end goal. 

All while taking into account, and applying the concept of not placing quick judgement on what’s right and what’s wrong, or how life is supposed to be at a certain stage/phase. 

While we can observe how we do not wish for it to end up, let’s remember that certain circumstances or choices made led to the end result. Whether or not it was a choice or forced by circumstance, there is always a reason to it.

We can’t control everything in life, but we can observe, learn and grow from observation and experimentation. 

Let’s not be quick to judge others or their circumstances, but remain open-minded and adapt our own lives along the way – hopefully towards the end goal we wish for.

True friends

2 07 2015


Wise words shared,
To my heart I’ll keep them.
Thankful for true friends,
Who tell you those honest words,
And keep you grounded,
Ensure your continual growth as a person.
Constantly challenging you,
To become a better person,
To guide you through their past experiences,
So you can learn from them.

Grateful for these hidden gems of people,
Hopeful that to them I am also that friend,
Listening in,
I will grow,
Change and mould myself to be a better person,
Because then that’s how I can repay their kindness.
To take their advice and grow from there,
Stepping out of the comfort zone,
Mending those flaws,
And strive for betterment.

School and you

16 02 2013

in classes we met
your face I won’t forget
to see your smile with a wave
is reason enough to stay.

slowly i fell ill
“cny,” they all said
but down inside I knew
that it was my heart instead.

no more I would say
overthinking leads to dismay
“I knew,” I’d said
I know, I would say.

I’d wish to read your mind
if there’s a feeling like mine
and then I would know
and then I will go.

just one sentence from you
and I will know
to stay or to leave
just the right words from you.

Why girls love chic-lit?

4 08 2012

Royalty-free Image: Pages of book forming a heart shape

Why females love reading chic-lit?

Basically because it lets them live a fairy tale they know they could never experience themselves.

Yet the entertainment and hope that eventually that fairy tale may come true pushes them on each day.

Because despite the many people whom they have met and known, no one really knows their entire self.

What was your past really like, from the moment they’ve met and gotten to know you.

What kind of deep, dark secrets have they not yet discovered?

Every person steps into our lives for a reason, one might say.

But no one will truly know us in our entirety, not unless we let them.

And that’s why girls like their chic-lit so much.

Because it’s there that they find their true freedom, in their own mind.

Where they know every single thing about themselves, and yet able to relate to whatever they are reading.

Been down with the flu and cough the entire week, ruined all exercise routine I had originally planned for.

Hadn’t been easy either, feeling restless and irritable the whole week.

What’s more, I had to cancel several appointments to stay in though I’m not complaining about the opportunity to do so, especially before the hectic final year of uni is starting soon.

Am more glad that I don’t have to deal with the horrible NUS CORS bidding system since I got preallocated all of my modules this semester, strangely happening only in my ninth semester of school.

It also doesn’t hurt that I finally got down to reading the books that I’ve borrowed from the library – thus inspiring this post btw.

Going to keep this short and go back to reading and hopefully more inspiration.

Ciao for now!

Post-breakup stages

24 07 2012

Well, it’s not like i’m anywhere near what I’m going to blog about but felt that there are a handful of people around me who might feel it useful so here goes. It’s really reiterating what’s already written in the article so to those who might find that this came at the right time, I believe that after going through the various stages of post-breakup emotions, you’ll do just fine (:

Stage I – Initial crash

The article talked about shock being the initial reaction that most people will face upon breaking up, but I’d feel that sometimes, we would kind of see it coming. I mean, it may be shocking for some, but I’m pretty sure that deep down inside, we can tell that something’s not quite right the few days or weeks pre-breakup so the shock described may not ultimately apply to all.

Rather, I think naming it the initial crash applies more generically. You know, the usual ‘depressive’ syndromes start showing – basically the lack of motivation to live. The crying to sleep, loss of appetite, inability to do anything, the moodiness. It’s normal really, and depending on each individual, this stage can last for varying periods of time. 

Grieving after all, is a natural human reaction. Still, it shouldn’t last for too long because it can get unhealthy. Solution? As the article suggests, talking it out to someone. For me, I’d suggest someone close like a best bud or relative. I guess this stems from the fact that I’m a rather private person and would feel comfortable sharing these topics with people I’m really close with, but it’s your choice really. What one really needs at this stage is a listening ear, and well, many friends are comfortable with me being theirs so yeah, if necessary I’m sure whoever who needs me as their listening ear know how to reach me (:

Stage II – Denial

I would totally agree with the author with this – do not go into the vicious cycle of getting more depressed by not accepting the breakup. With technology and social media so readily available, I’m sure it’s easy to go through all the old photos, FB posts, replay significant songs over and over again or even the urge to contact your ex. DON’T.

This is probably one of the greatest mistakes of friends’ advice too, to encourage your friend-who-just-broke-up to contact their ex to have some sort of closure in the (broken) relationship. Well, even if there is a need to, it shouldn’t be done when you’re in this stage, post-breakup. You’re just not ready emotionally. 

It’s usually better to think ahead instead, difficult to do but it’s doable. For one, at least you’ve been through a relationship and it has taught you some life lessons. Every relationship does, no matter how short or long. Whether about trust issues, learning to accommodate each other, a better understanding of how the mind of your relationship partner works (and how you can use this understanding for future relationships), simply how to have a good time, good or bad memories, I’m sure there are lessons to learn in each of them. So life up your head and look ahead, there’s more to being depressed that you can be post-breakup. 

An alternative to what the article suggested of changing your routine and filling your time with something is to really go the revenge route. Not in the negative way of revenge that we know. For example, you’re newly single and with more time on your hands, you can choose to do what you’ve always wanted to but haven’t had the time to do so, say a more disciplined exercise routine. And the revenge that I’m talking about here is to use this as a motivation for yourself. In this case, it could be to stick to your routine to make your ex regret breaking up with you. But a precautionary note here, ‘revenge’ should always only be a temporary measure. Essentially after you’ve gotten a hang of your new routine, start doing it for yourself because you deserve it and you deserve better! 

Stage III – Anger

This is similar and related to overcoming the previous stage of denial. 

It’s easy to say that in relationships, all is fair and we shouldn’t start blaming either one for the cause of the breakup. After all, it takes two hands to clap right? So the same goes for relationships. But as I’ve said, it’s easy to say but not that easy to process in our brains. 

So like what I suggested earlier, shift your anger to something more useful instead, for the time being.

Until you’re able to let go and calm the fiery waters in you, there is no point going ahead to the next stage. 

Stage VI – Getting over it

This time, the author names it dejection but I don’t feel that it’s sufficient to list this stage as simply an emotion. After all, I’d think that you’ll be feeling dejected throughout all the stages of post-breakup. Memories of the relationship will definitely flash across throughout the whole time you’re in the post-breakup phase. 

What I think is more accurate is to really find closure in the relationship and simply getting over it. 

In a way, expending the anger to whatever else you’re using to distract yourself in stage three, draining all that anger would probably leave you too exhausted to feel anything else otherwise. So what’s left next is to accept the facts and move on with your life – new routine and all.

Continuing the disciplined exercise routine example, finding closure could come in the form of accepting the new you and the reality, and coming to a conclusion to motivate yourself simply for yourself rather than to expel all that anger in you previously. 

At times, our self-esteem could have hurt by this breakup. Confidence in ourselves may have fallen. So all the more importantly is for us to pick ourselves up and build back and accept ourselves. 

As I always like to say, there’s more to life than this. 

In this case, this refers to our relationships. Honestly though, we ourselves define what this represents.

It can be anything life throws at us, but ultimately how we end up is purely based on our own decisions, religious beliefs aside. 

For those not facing post-breakup situations in their lives, I hope that this post also serves as a timely reminder to appreciate yourself for who you are. We’ve come so far in our lives, whatever our age may be, but each step is a learning journey. We may fall sometimes, but if we can pick ourselves up, there is so much more that we can do/achieve/see/learn from life.

Also, never think that you’re alone in this world. There are so many people out there who care for you, be it family, friends, or even acquaintances. Sometimes, it’s simply because we close our eyes to the right people that we’re missing out and feeling so miserable! So open your eyes today, appreciate everything and everyone around you, including yourself (:

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